(A Random Post)

So I managed to find some uranium ore available for sale on Amazon.com, which I assume is mainly for high school teachers to buy so that they can show off real live uranium to their classes. You’d probably get a real kick out of seeing the Geiger counter clicking it up when you point it towards your $22.95 sample.

In case you wondering – and I know you all are – this is obviously the naturally occurring uranium-238 isotope that emits minimally low level beta radiation, and is not weapons-grade. And before you ask, for that, you would have to enrich a sample of uranium such that it has at least an 85% composition of the fissile uranium-235 isotope, which has a natural abundance of only 0.72%, so it’s not that easy to do. Currently, the most common method of uranium enrichment accepted by most of the world is via the gas centrifuge process, where uranium in the form of highly toxic uranium hexafluoride gas is rotated at high speeds (or if you will, “centrifuged”) to separate out the less dense clouds of uranium-235 from the uranium-238.

Though you could also always just bombard uranium-238 with fast neutrons until it beta decays into plutonium-239 (which is fissile) via neptunium-239…but I think you need like a nuclear reactor or something to do that.

However, the fact that this product is clearly not the exciting, fissionable isotope has not discouraged Amazon customers from leaving jackass product reviews anyway. My favourite is the James Bond one (note that the major use of uranium in the military is actually as a high-density armour penetrator), though the “nuklear car” one was fairly enjoyable as well.

Of particular note is the “Customers Who Bought Items Like This Also Bought” list, which is always good times. Take a quick glance when you have the opportunity…I didn’t even know you could buy shit like that on Amazon. Didn’t this site used to just sell books? The link between those items is something I’m damningly curious about, because I can’t justify any of it from a logical perspective. All I can guess is that mice killed someone’s father, and now they’re building some insanely elaborate, fucked up mouse trap with cherry flavoured anal lube and rectal douche syringes.

…and uranium.

Honestly, I don’t care why, and I don’t care how…but I want in.

Oh, and Street Fighter 4 is coming out.

If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits 88 miles per hour…you’re gonna see some serious shit.

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Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.

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