And Taco Bell Is 12 Minutes

If Food Porn Daily is like the classy, letter filled Playboy magazine of food pornography, then surely Epic Meal Time is the raunchy dirty stuff that’s only available through mail-order and is most assuredly illegal in some way. (I spent over 10 minutes trying to check if I had made this joke already at some point throughout the history of this site – I’m positive I had – but I was ultimately not able to confirm nor deny this.) Protip: Do not watch these videos if you are hungry, otherwise you may be potentially tempted into doing some possibly very regrettable and shameful things.

On an unrelated subject, the nearest Wendy’s location to my place is a 16 minute walk away. Or at least I think it is…walking back took 22 minutes. Maybe it is farther returning than going.

– Damn you Kotaku, damn you and your rampant, out of control, irresponsible speculation. It is like a half second clip showing like a single frame of a dude with a gun. You would have to be insane to interpret that as a Mass Effect 3 “rumour,” and even more insane to believe even a fraction of it.

Unfortunately, I am completely insane so I have been completely consumed by this “rumour” now that is nothing more than baseless speculation, and now I will be unable to eat or sleep until someone kills this thing. It looks nothing like the Incisor Rifle, but if I kinda squint a bit, IT KINDA DOES A LITTLE BIT!

– Forget Mass Effect 3 though, this Van Helsing MMORPG is where the future lies. VAAAAAAN HELSIIIIIING!!!

– Let it be said for the record here, that as a renown lifelong Miami Heat fan (uh…Glen Rice, whoooo!), I have not lost my faith in them despite their less than perfect start to the season. However it has to be said that one of my favourite things about this basketball season is that I can now finally objectively see Chris Bosh as a basketball player without bias, now that he’s off my hometown team. Now I no longer need to make excuses for him and justify all his faults when he is destroyed by all his critics in the increased scrutiny of the South Beach media circus (?), fairly or unfairly.

I can’t speak towards the quality of their new show on The Score since I haven’t had a chance to watch it (as I am now poor and no longer have a television), but I do know that The Basketball Jones are still just as good as ever in their originating medium, and they do a great job here with their take on this whole situation with Like A Bosh.

(As I type this, Chris Bosh is currently on pace for 44 points against the Suns at halftime. Go Heat!)

– Also just real quick…while they’re talking about winning 70 games in Miami, this is what they’re talking about in Minnesota. The end of that fake free throw practice bit in there just kills me – easily the funniest, intentional, thing associated with the NBA that I’ve seen in years. …which is not saying a lot, but regardless, there is not a single person in the world that does not love Kevin Love. It’s impossible.

– This is an unusually long trailer for Your Highness, which reunites Pineapple Express principles in James Franco, Danny McBride, and director David Gordon Green (who also directs Eastbound & Down) in entry to the burgeoning stoner comedy action genre. Yes, I believe the movie title is also a reference to weed – it is kind of genius like that, yeah? And they threw in Natalie Portman and Zooey Deschanel as well just for kicks. I am trying to think of ways they could have made this movie even more enticing to me, and I am coming up blank.

Just trust me…it’s better to be strangled by a necklace of Mexicans, than to be strangled by no one at all.

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Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.

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