13 Monkeys

Oh wow, so yeah, some stuff’s happened since that last post. But it’s a nice snapshot of how many uncertainties there were up in the air at the time, and how apparent I was already setting myself up for tragedy. The stench of my desperation has been preserved perfectly in internet amber for future ridicule.

And if there ever was a single line that best described this site, that may just be it.


Is that good? Is that bad? I don’t even know. I’ve also lost track of why all of this still happens. It was just for attention at the beginning, obviously. But after like three weeks and the novelty wore off, I have no idea what really kept it going. I think maybe I just liked writing a lot. And I mean that in a more literal sense – just the act of turning thoughts into words, not building anything more than that. No expectation of having or creating an audience, no prose, no point, no real purpose. Not that it was entirely fruitless though…I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little bit jazzed when I typed out “miscellaneous” for the first time without tripping up spellcheck. And I would never have known back in my youth how expansive the world of Malaysian bear porn really is. So much wasted time.

But there’s over 1,500 posts in this bitch, that’s too much to explain away with just “I kinda like writing.” It’s just one of those things that you do even though you’ve forgotten why you do it but you’ve been doing it for so long you just keep doing it. Like tipping at restaurants, wearing ties, and blessing people after they sneeze. I’m one of those infinite monkeys tying into infinite typewriters that will not yield the complete works of William Shakespeare. I am one of the gibberish infinite monkeys.

Every year I write a bit about how I’m going to live forever and this horrible blog will never die, and I always believe it.

Just not so sure this time. But I guess we’ll find out.

This is a thousand monkeys working at a thousand typewriters. Soon, they’ll have written the greatest novel known to mankind.

“It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times”!?! You stupid monkey!



Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.



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