(A Random Post)

Just got this little bit of news for you today. And it’s one of those that make you sit back and wonder…”What the bloomin’ baskets of bosh is this!?!” Not because it’s a ridiculous story – I can actually imagine this scene quite clearly in my mind’s eye – but because it’s considered worthy enough to post as “news.” The fact that they mentioned what song it was and added a file picture of Justin Timberlake…just makes no sense.

But again, the story itself isn’t that outrageous. In fact, it could quite possibly have been me in that story instead. Here’s the set-up. Some 19 year-old (ie. me), driving around (something I do), singing along to a Justin Timberlake song (also something I do). And specifically Rock Your Body, which is my favourite of his four singles. At this point, a bee flies into his mouth. Now that’s never actually happened to me, because thankfully my life has been rather bee-free. But his reaction of swerving the car into a tree in a blind panic to get rid of the bee seems quite consistent with what I would do.

And I don’t really know all the details of Mr. Nunes’ reaction, but I think mine would have a definite Chris Farley feel to it. I mean…you can imagine it too, right?

“Don’t be so quick to…walk away. Dance with me, I wanna – EYGH!!! For the love of God, a bee is IN MY MOUTH!!! I can’t DRIVE! *frantic thrashing from side to side* OH MY GOD! It’s a BEE!!! THEY’RE HUGE AND THEY STING CRAZY!!! YOUR FIREARMS ARE USELESS AGAINST THEM!!! AHH I CAN’T STOP – there’s a tree! Oh my God, we’re burning alive, I can’t feel my legs!”

And then the ambulance comes, and the medic gets out and says “OH…MY…GOD.” And the new guy’s in the corner puking his guts out – HUUYRUK! HUUYRUK!!!

…or, you know…something to that effect. Bonus points to the more observant WAMBAG readers, who noticed I actually combined two Chris Farley lines there, and rather seamlessly I’m proud to say. And I had some trouble figuring out the correct onomatopoeia for puking. “Huuyruk” sounds too much like a fighting game move, like “shoryuken” or something.

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Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.

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