(A Random Post)

McCarty Slang

(soundtrack)

Low – Cracker

I sooooo don’t want to finish my Intro To Film Essay.

It’s funny because I also have this project on childhood autism to finish and my group and I have NO idea what we’re doing. It’s due on Tuesday also. All we have to do is stand around and talk , so it shouldn’t be a big problem. It’s just one more thing though.

In case you’re wondering about the title, I always wanted to use it for VoX, the (un)official magazine of Markam District High School. As you all know I used to write a pretty kickass b-ball section and I always thought this would be a great title for a story about Boston Celtics forward Walter (WALTAH!) McCarty. Unfortunately, there isn’t much to say about him so it never came around. Then again, I did write an article about the Celtics so I could have put a picture of him in there and then…ah, never mind. *sigh* More regrets about high school…

On Friday, I was hanging out at Angel’s and we were watching Pride And Prejudice. If you don’t know what it is, it’s this British period piece about wealthy people and their problems and social class and blah blah f’in’ blah! Cot’ damn this movie was boring! And she told me it was over FOUR hours long! What the hell is that? And it’s just people standing around and walking and talking and doing nothing! It sucks! Don’t get me wrong, I can enjoy intellectual cinema but come on, someone has got to die. Maybe two people. I think there should be some kind of rule that in any dramatic film, at least one person should die for every hour and a half of film. Is that asking too much? Luckily she had some stuffed animals around so I amused myself by having them sodomize each other. I even used props.

I watched this other movie last night called The Returner. It’s a Japanese flick. It’s like The Terminator meets The Matrix meets Transformers meets E.T. meets…whatever, this movie was way too derivative for me to list every flick or show that it ripped off. The funny thing is, as usual I was watching it with the subtitles on and the subtitles had NOTHING to do with the dubbed dialogue. The subs were the proper translation while the dub was obviously meant to sync the voices with the mouth movement. So you’d have the dub say something like, “Come on, we’ve got to get out of here! This place is about to blow up like an old man after too much dairy!” and the sub is like, “Run!” Awesome. It doesn’t help that the movie ends in this temporal paradox that’s just like, WTF mate?

A’ight, I’m getting back to work. I just came on to post another Ben Affleck skit, anyway. If you can find this episode and download it, do it. It was awesome.

The Full Moon Killer – Read it and laugh. Oh yeah, it mentions it, but when you’re reading make sure you imagine Ben’s voice as sounding really pretentious and slightly British. Like people in Pride And Prejudice! Full circle!

“And when I leave, come together like butt cheeks!”

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Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.

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