(A Random Post)

But This Could Work For A CBS Dram-edy

I’m Looking Through You – The Wallflowers

Yeah, so the Elena thing didn’t work out. Too bad for me. That doesn’t mean I was going to shirk my other social responsibilities for the week.

I told Max that I would go play basketball with him and his people at the Thornhill Community Centre Tuesday night and indeed I did, even though I was still reeling from the Elena effects (or lack thereof). What was social about this you ask? Going meant that I had to have a reunion with Mike (Laughlin) and Nathan (Appleton) of MDHS fame. I have mixed feelings about those two. On the one hand, I always felt like they were two fringe cool guys who hung out with Max and I because we were two goofy a-holes and we all liked the Raptors. I also perceived that there was a lack of respect there. Not that there was any reason they should respect me, but still. On the other hand, we had some genuinely good times. We share the same kind of juvenile humour and made a lot of jokes about owing each other sexual favours. If that’s not a true friendship, what is?

As soon as I entered the gym I gave them the usual “Hey, haven’t seen you in a few years” head nod. I turned around to put my stuff down and Mike surprised me with a bearhug. His homoerotic gesture was greatly appreciated. From there, there wasn’t much time to talk during the games, but I can safely say that it was good to see them again and I look forward to talking to them more in the next few weeks.

After the late night basketball, I was kind of drained and had a bit of a headache. Not that that stopped me from staying up until the wee hours in the morning playing NBA 2K7. None of this would have mattered if I didn’t have to have lunch with Caroline Walker today. I strongly thought about calling it off so I could sleep in. I’m so glad I didn’t.

I ended up being an hour late, but I’d called her before so she didn’t mind. Lunch itself was pleasant, if boring. She was reluctant to talk to me about her latest male pursuit because we were eating in the cafeteria at her residence and she was concerned about who might know him there. Also, he apparently passed right by me at one point and I didn’t even know. Whatever. Afterwards, we went back up to her room and her door knob was jammed for some reason so we had to wait half an hour for a custodian to show up. She ended up jimmying it open without his help anyway. When we got into her room, I told her that it reeked of “feminine independence”.

Audrey Hepburn poster. Book of eighteenth century women’s poetry. The Very Best of Sheryl Crow CD. A real chick’s chick.

We sat around for an hour as she talked to me about the guy and made me look at Facebook pictures of him. It wasn’t a great time, but then this BeyoncĂ© song began to play on her internet radio station and she started dancing. She’s got some moves! And it was funny because she has this fan in her room that, as far as I can tell, is strictly there for posing purposes. She turned that thing on and started grooving in front of it. It was ridiculous, but entertaining. She can be so serious sometimes that I’m surprised when she shows off this cool, playful side. She was a lot of fun to be around today.

The good vibes continued as I went shopping with her. Oh, you’ve probably noticed that there’s a noticeable absence of school in this post. She made me skip my tutorial because she’s the devil. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. I ended up helping her shop for dresses and tops, which was far more valuable for my education in my opinion. There are some things you can’t learn in class. Like, what kind of shoes go with a cream coloured dress. And whether a top is showing enough “cha-cha” (cleavage, I think?). Do I even need to tell you that we shopped for almost two hours and she ended up buying the first dress she tried on anyway? Well, I just did. Still, it was enjoyable. I’ll never understand why any straight man would object to following an attractive woman around and watch her try on clothes. Not to mention a lot of the clerks in those shops are hot as hell. Not that I would look while I was in the company of another female. *ahem*

The best part was that believe I provided some, er, “not useless” insight. At least compared to some of the other guys. Like at the first store we went to, this guy was giving advice to his girlfriend and everytime she popped out of the change room he was just like, “Pretty good, pretty good.” What a d-bag. I was commenting on the colours and how club appropriate the attire was and helping to zip her up. And I didn’t even use the words “fabulous” or “georgeous” once. Is there a better “guy friend” than me? I’ve got to be one of the best, right? Right.

I really needed that kind of outing today though. Good conversation, lots of running around and making me feel useful, random stupidity. It was good to get my confidence back after yesterday. There was no connection with Elena at all and I thought my game was suffering, but today was much better. There was a real flow to everything, you know?

The day was wrapped up by my most painful social obligation of the week. Having to watch Beauty and the Geek with Shirley! Ugh. Forcing me to watch that dreadful show, with its hilarious dialogue and undeniably amusing challenges. And all those beautiful women! Gah! She’s lucky I’m her friend, otherwise there’s no way I would have put up with the thrilling makeover episode today that had me on the edge of her couch. No way! All sarcasm aside, I was kind of perturbed today because my girl, the wonderfully bitchy (and wonderfully HAWT) Andrea got eliminated. Seriously, why do I even bother breathing any more?

Hello mother. So nice to hear your voice. No, I am not on anything. I know that things have been difficult for you lately and I was thinking, ‘you carried me for nine months, let me carry you now’…uh huh…well, right back at you Coleen! Yeah, that’s right! You cut Pop’s balls off and left him in the street to die!

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Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.

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