Shit Just Got Real

Wow, completely forgot again. One of these years, I will remember.

Yet another August 5th has passed, marking yet another year that we’re still here. The WAMBAG has existed now for nine years. We arrived eight years before Justin Bieber’s debut studio album, Weezer hadn’t recorded Make Believe yet and was still arguably a good band. Five years before Gmail became publicly available and when this was an iPod; I wrote the first iteration of the site on a Windows ME machine. Jean Chr├ętien was Prime Minister and George Bush’s approval rating was close to double what Obama’s is now. The WAMBAG’s been around on the internet longer than American forces have been in Iraq. That is a long time!

Nine years! We are on the verge of a whole fucking decade of The WAMBAG existing! That is too big of a concept for my brain to handle right now. A fucking DECADE! When you speak of individual years, that type of granularity is hard to consider within the scope of a larger context…but a decade…I mean you can break down the entire history of human civilization into decades. There is a definite subset of decades in which mankind has had civilization…and soon, The WAMBAG will have spanned one of those decades. We would be able to speak about it in the same context we talk about free love (the 1960’s), synthpop (the 1980’s), or parachute pants (the 1990’s).

…except those things ended.

But let’s table the decade talk for now, since we’re not quite there yet, still single digits. But tune in this year on The WAMBAG; I have a very ambitious year long project that officially kicks off today that will lead right into our landmark anniversary. It’s going to be crazy! Lots of new looks, big ideas, and possible guest stars. You won’t believe what we got on tap – it’s a delicious brew of terrifying lows, dizzying highs, and creamy middles.

Am I telling the truth? You’ll never know. Well, you kind of do. …or actually, you already conclusively know for fact that I am far too apathetic to do something like that, it’s just going to be slow-moving-business as usual. You know that very well already. The world will continue to slowly revolve around us just like Michael Bay’s cameras, and it will be just as awesome as every one of those movies. Especially The Island.

Here’s to another nine, just as fine.

When you do things right, people won’t be sure you’ve done anything at all.

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Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.

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