Filling Out A Prescription OR Post For The Devil

Summer Wine – Nancy Sinatra and Lee Hazlewood

My mom had this song on repeat the other day while she was doing stuff in the kitchen. The house was almost completely silent except for this song playing. I was laying on the couch relaxing, watching a Maverick-Suns game. It was nice. Needless to say, the song has caught on with me.

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Oooh, I’m making a post on 06/06/06. Sign of the BEAST, man!. I’m fairly confident that I’m the only person who has made this connection.

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My boss is an unfortunate fellow. He wants to be a man of wisdom, someone that his employees will look to for guidance. The funny thing is, it’s his simplicity that I respect. As much as I dream about becoming a rock star or an actor or just becoming filthy, stinking rich, I’d be happy growing up and becoming like him. He’s got a lovely wife, four beautiful kids and a decent, honest business. When he tries to be more than that, it’s just sad. And funny, of course.

For example, on Sunday he was telling me about how he was sad that I was quitting because I was an important role-player in the organization. He started going into this incomprehensible hockey analogy and I was just like, “God, let me die now.” Putting aside the fact that I don’t like hockey, the analogy got completely out of control. He started rambling about the goalie and the defencemen and the Buffalo Sabres and…aw man, it was awful. When it was over, I breathed a sigh of relief. I should have known the worst was yet to come.

As he was about to go the backroom, he starts asking me about relationships. He asks me if I have a girlfriend. Then he starts talking about how cute the girl who works in the pharmacy is. I admit, I’ve flirted with her in the past. However, I didn’t pursue it for two reasons: 1) She had a boyfriend and 2) She vaguely resembles Helena Bonham Carter in Planet Of The Apes. That sounds harsh, but I still think she’s kind of cute (Both the pharmacy girl and Monkey Helena). I think the only reason he (and a bunch of other people actually) thinks that there’s the possibility of something going on between her and I is because we’re both Chinese. Thanks a bunch, boss. He went on to tell me that she had broken up with her boyfriend and I should check that out. How he had attained that information, I have no idea. Excuse me if this paragraph was a touch awkward. Just know that the actual conversation was a hundred thousand times more awkward.

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I’ve been dreaming about work a lot lately. I’m not actually at work, but I’m usually somewhere else and work stuff will materialize. I could be in the middle of the desert and suddenly a till will pop up in front of me and I have to count it. Or I have to give change to some random person. It is highly disturbing. I am restless.

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The movie I’m most hyped for right now? THE PRESTIGE!!! The title is not actually in caps by the way, that’s meant to indicate my excitement. The same goes for the exclamation points. Anyway, check out this cast list. For those of you scoring at home, that’s Wolverine, Batman, Alfred, Ziggy Stardust, Gollum and Scarlett Johansson. And Piper Perabo, who is hot. Plus, it’s directed by Christopher Nolan (or C-No, as his friends call him…okay, just me…but I’m his friend so it counts.). Clean your jeans fellas. This one drops in October.

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You know what movie I got caught up watching late at night? Ghost. It is strangely engaging. Did you know that it got nominated for a Best Picture Academy Award? That’s a headscratcher right there. This movie should have been a failure by all accounts. You’ve got Patrick Swayze in the lead role, which usually turns out poorly for everyone (except for Dirty Dancing, natch). I mean, this is a role that according to imdb.com, was turned down by the likes of Tom Cruise, Kevin Bacon and Alec Baldwin because they thought it would be TOO CHEESY. Wow. However, he somehow manages to pull out most of the emotional scenes (it helps that he’s buried in white light during his emotional farewell at the end of the film). Demi Moore is her usual useless self. She mostly sobs and whines throughout the whole thing. I’m not a fan. Whoopi Goldberg (who won an Oscar for this movie!) is great. People forget that she was a serious actress before she became a comedian (I think) and here she brings the best of both worlds. It’s such a hokey film, and long too, but it works. Two scenes I have to catch anytime the movie is on:

1) The scene where Sam (Swayze) wants to learn how to touch stuff. He travels to the subway to find this creepy ghost and convinces him to teach him the ways of, uh, poltergeist…ism. It’s a classic training scene that would fit into any modern superhero film. The only thing that sucks is that it’s not a montage. It would have been great if it ended with the two apparations yucking it up as they pushed unsuspecting passengers onto the subway tracks.

2) The scene where Oda Mae (Goldberg) allows herself to be possessed by Sam so that he can touch Molly (Moore) through Oda Mae’s body. Yeah, there’s an obvious lesbian thing going on there, but other than that it’s a great, over the top scene. Once that Righteous Brothers Unchained Melody kicks in…I’ll tell you, it gets a little dusty in my house. I mean, seriously, the dust levels get dangerously high.

Heh. You know, you AIs are almost too cute. How do I unplug you when you take over the world?
Ask me the purpose of existence, and I explode.