(A Random Post)

Grindin’

The Mending Of The Gown – Sunset Rubdown

My second week of work begins tomorrow and I can say right now that the first week was not encouraging. I have to wake up at 5:30 in the morning every day so my dad can drop me off at York Mills station. I used to go to sleep at 5:30 in the morning. It has not been a smooth transition. I’ve been a zombie at work so far. Considering that I’ve just started, that’s not a good sign.

All I’ve been doing so far is training and it has it’s ups and downs. The good thing is that I’m usually given a task and then left alone to take care of it, which is good because I get nervous when I have someone looking over my shoulder all the time. The bad thing is that my trainer has done a good job of making me feel like a pest whenever I ask him a question. He’s the classic answer a question with a question type of teacher. Like, I’ll make a mistake and he’ll be like, “Why did you do that?” Um, shouldn’t you be telling me? He seems like a nice guy, but we’re not exactly making any significant connections on the teacher-student level. The quality of the Markham District High School staff has skewed my perception forever.

The job, as far as I can tell, is some kind of trouble shooting where I look at programs that failed to run and write a few lines here and there to fix them up and then move on. At least I hope that’s what it is, otherwise I have no idea what I’m doing. I’m having trouble getting into this whole idea of working at a bank. On the one hand, if I don’t get it then I’m going to get kicked out before my training is even done, which will bring shame and dishonour to my house. On the other hand, if I do get it, it means I’m going to be stuck working at a bank until…who knows? They’ve got me looking at employee benefits and stuff and telling me about the gifts I’ll get if I work there for two, five, ten, twenty years and it’s scaring the hell out of me. The two year gift is some kind of ornate cube ornament. I’m getting that cube and I’m breaking out.

I know I should be more open minded about this, but sometimes a situation doesn’t feel right from the get-go, you know? I’m sure things will get better.

*****

It doesn’t look like I’ll have time to post my full holiday thoughts, but I want to say that it was definitely the least depressing holiday I’ve experienced in a while. I got to spend time with everyone that I wanted to (except for Angel, but I’m going to find time to see her soon for sure), I made it through the annual UofT friends Christmas party without wanting to strangle anyone and we spent the first week of 2008 playing Rock Band. I experienced the occasional moment of winter wistfulness, but even that was appreciated in a “It’s nice to be walking around downtown by myself listening to Long December and wishing that I was still capable of feeling” kind of way. All in all, 2007 was outstanding.

*****

Changing subjects completely, I want to remind everyone to watch the revamped American Gladiators every Monday night at 8 PM! Not that it needs the publicity since it’s been a surprising ratings hit, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get on this bandwagon while there’s still time. It’s just as cheesy as you remember, maybe even more so. There are a few problems, namely the MTV style camera work (lots of weird angles and WAY too many cuts that make the events nearly impossible to watch) and the horrible play by play commentary. The latter is a classic example of new-school sports commentating wherein the announcer feels compelled to explain everything. For example, someone will be climbing a rope ladder and the voice-over will be like, “Oh, he’s trying to climb the rope ladder. He’s moving vertically, grabbing that rope and pulling himself up in a climbing fashion. That ladder is made of rope!” I have fucking eyes!

Also, the Gladiators are actually kind of weak and too nice. Back in the earliest seasons of the original, it seemed impossible to beat the Gladiators in anything and they would act like arrogant pricks (or prickettes) too. Now, the challengers seem to have some degree of success at least 50% of the time and the Gladiators are way too gracious and humble. I want these guys to act like over the top cartoon characters. This isn’t a real sport!

Sorry. That was a lot of negatives. They’re always easier to write about. The matter of fact is that if you enjoyed the original or just feel like watching an old-fashioned, colourful, fast paced game show where people dress and speak in a ridiculous fashion, then please give American Gladiators a shot. I recommend these things for your own good.

Plus, there’s a really hot Gladiator (Gladiatrice?) named Crush. She’s actually a mixed martial arts figher named Gina Carano. Here’s an interview she did a while ago. She comes off as extremely cute and endearing and not the slightest bit dykey or threatening. I’m even willing to ignore the fact that she’s a woman who could easily wreck my ass, usually an instant deal breaker. Indeed, the possibility that she might choke the life out of me with a perfectly applied kata hajime only makes her MORE attractive.

I’ve got more links than usual today, but don’t worry, my posts are not going to become carbon copies of William’s. This was just a particularly fruitful week of links:

Here’s some arcade trash talk that my brother sent me, which he himself got from Kotaku.com. Further evidence of two things:

1) The “Versus” series of fighting games are the best video games ever made and
2) Black people are and always will be funnier than everyone else.

Basketball stuff:

Congratulations on Dwight Howard’s new baby boy. Even though he’s a devout Christian and he’s having this child out of wedlock, I’m not going to judge him and say that he’s compromised his entire moral system because of careless behaviour. He’s not the first Christian guy to have a kid like this and he won’t be the last. It’s how he takes care of this kid from now on that is important. That said, jokes like this were inevitable and harmless.

Courtesy of NBADraft.net, Russell Westbrook, 2009 NBA draft sleeper, “YouTubes” Jamal Boykin:

Lastly, some movie trailers:

I actually had to search through the archives to confirm this and I can’t believe that noone made a post about this new movie coming out with Scarlett Johansson AND Natalie Portman. I’m conflicted. For obvious reasons, I must watch it. It’s also one of those heavy handed period pieces, which means that I must stay as far away from it as possible. Also, the Hulk is in it, which leaves me feeling strangely indifferent.

OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD!

I know this post was kind of a downer, so I’ll wrap this up by saying that my job is probably still better than this guy’s. They couldn’t even give him a more comfortable stool?

Bento box from sushi king. The lesbian scene from Mulholland Drive. Time for gentleman’s lunch!

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Destined to fight the world's evil, The WAMBAG endures massive battles involving impossible stunts, races on horse-pulled carriages, and the desecration of enchanting medieval castles (all done with dizzying computer graphics). Not only does the eye candy keep on coming, the tongue-in-cheek writing and deep Transylvanian accents perfect the film with a dose of dark humor.

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