The End Of An Era

(soundtrack)

All By Myself – LaToya London

My barber, Nellie, has retired.

God, I’m depressed.

I think everyone knows that I like to live a life of routines. A life of constants. Yeah, I enjoy the occasional bit of variety, but at the end of the day I like to think that there are some things I can count on. Like who cuts my hair.

Before Nellie, I was going to this woman’s house for private hair cutting sessions. She was a freaking butcher. I left every encounter with welts, I shit you not. Luckily she ended up moving away, into a bigger house no less, that was ironically funded by her victims. But that’s another story.

Nellie was great. And over the last couple of years, I’d finally earned the right to walk in there and say, “The usual.” Her hair cutting touch was so soft, so perfect. She even engaged in awkward small talk. She’d ask how school was and how things were going. Those are the little things that I’ll miss. As a bonus, she usually let me cut ahead of other people who were there before me. Sweet.

The guy who cut my hair today, Mr. Lam, wasn’t too bad. He doesn’t speak English. He’s kind of stiff. He didn’t cut my hair quite short enough. *sigh*

I think Nellie has earned herself a flashback montage:

*doodle-oo, doodle-oo, doodle-oo, doodle-oo, doodle-oo…*

(insert wavy, screen distorting effect)

5 years ago – My first hair cut

4 years ago – The hair cutting continues

3 years ago – Uh…see previous years

2 years ago – The usual…THE USUAL!!!

1 year ago – You get the idea

*doodle-oo, doodle-oo, doodle-oo, doodle-oo, doodle-oo…*

(insert wavy, screen distorting effect)

Oh, good times. I always had this fantasy that I’d become rich and pay her back by coming back to the old neighbourhood to get my hair cut and leaving her 50 dollar tips. Guess that’s not going to happen.

On an unrelated note, my outing with the UofT people went well, very well in fact. I’ll tell you guys about it later. I’ll just say that it included this amusing exchange:

(as we follow Michelle into a Yoga store)

Me: Oh, Michelle does Yoga?

Julius: (straight-faced) No, she just likes the clothing.

*Ba-Dump Tsh!*

“What’s the deal with homework? You’re not working on your home!”

“Booooo!“