Walking (So Much Walking) In A Summer Wonderland OR Goodbye And Thanks I Smell Like Fish

(soundtrack)

Charmless Man – Blur

I ain’t got too much to say about my trip to Wonderland. It was a’ight. I just wish my university friends weren’t such an indecisive group of hob knobbers. Of our first 5 hours there, I swear we spent an hour and a half waiting in line and another three hours arguing about which fucking ride we should line up for next. There couldn’t have been more than thirty minutes of actual ride time. At one point, we must have been arguing for about 45 minutes and I was just like, “Ok, fuck you guys, we’re going to watch the Spongebob Squarepants 3D adventure! You can argue while we’re lining up!” That ruled by the way.

The trip was made even more unpleasant by this guy, Chris. He pulled the ol’ “vodka in a water bottle” trick again and was acting like a complete jackass for the entire day. It was sad too, because I was sitting next to him while he was driving and we were talking about music and stuff and I thought, “Finally, I’m getting along with the friends of my friends,” you know? As soon as he gets drunk, he’s just another asshole. I don’t hate the guy, but man, get a fucking life and learn to have a personality without alcohol alright?

The one bright spot, besides the fact that David and Michelle were there, was David’s little buddy, Andy. Andy is this 14 year old kid who has just finished elementary and is about to embark on the wonderful journey that is high school. So innocent and impressionable. Once I learned that he was a basketball fan and that his favourite player is Vince Carter (ah, youth), I knew we’d be off to a great start. I took him under my wing (read: we were ride buddies) for the rest of the day so that David could chill with everyone else. I regaled him with my tragedies and triumphs and gave him all kinds of life advice:

“When something is hard, you quit.” (classic)

“Don’t be like Chris.”

“When a girl tells you something once and you don’t understand, it’s okay to tell her. If after she repeats herself, you still don’t understand, nod your head and say something like ‘Yeah, okay’ or ‘Sure’.”

He didn’t really need that last one as he was a bit of a player! He’s all like, “Ah, I don’t really care about girls,” but everytime one of his lady friends from school saw him (they were on a field trip or something), they ran up to him and chatted away. Little bugga. The best part of the day was when Andy, David, David’s sister and I ditched the rest of the gang and just went out to go on as many rides as we could. We went on the Dragon Fire 3 times within 10 minutes. I broke out my screaming voice (simma-simma-HAAAAAAAAAAA!) even though I’ve been on the ride too many times to count.

All things considered, it was a nice day. It wasn’t amazing, though, and that’s what I was hoping for. I really wanted it to act as a bookend with last Saturday, when I got my job. I guess things just don’t work out like TV.

Work was okay today. I got to sell fish. Within the first 15 minutes, I was already screwing up BAD. However, I settled down and it turned out to be a pretty fun job. When I took my break, I went outside behind this restaurant, stole a chair and found some shade to sit it. You know, that kind of shade where the tree is letting just enough sunlight through so that you’re body is like, the perfect temperature. When I got back, the guy who took my job told me to take a longer break. So I went up to the lunchroom and joined my comrades who were enjoying a TV dinner. The entire grocery section was on break, it was ridiculous. Good times.

One other note about work. All the cashiers are chicks. They’re not bad looking, but I’m afraid to approach them for some reason. I keep thinking, “She’s a cashier, I’m a stockboy. We’re from different worlds.”

Ok, enough of my rambling. Here’s a link to something I read about in the Toronto Star. It’s about a German Super Baby. I’m not sure I feel comfortable talking about this right now. Be afraid. Be very, very afraid.

Homer: Lisa, did you see the Grammys?

Lisa: You beat Dexy’s Midnight Runners.

Homer: Well, you haven’t heard the last of them.