When the need arises for a post format featuring unfocused ramblings about subjects unable to support an entire post individually, the world turns to…Choking Yak’s Provoking Facts.

– On the other side of my cubicle wall, one of my senior managers (like the boss that’s levels above my boss, the Bowser to my goomba) is talking to my group’s administrative assistant (aka the frumpy woman that orders office supplies for us) about the changes she made to her “Facebook page.” He’s over 50 and she’s over 30…it’s creeping me out on a level that I’m not used to being at. I already have problems with old people using computers, or technology in general. They shouldn’t be on Facebook as well. Just yet another reason why I will never sign up.

– Ajax Wiki Search is a neat little site that attaches a search sidebar for Wikipedia that searches for stuff as you type. You can also make quick searches through the actual URL, as demonstrated in the original link.

– Three Friday’s ago, I stopped shaving. It started as just being lazy and not bothering to shave Friday morning for work…but then it carried on through the Thanksgiving weekend…and then I took Tuesday and Wednesday off…and suddenly it became the longest stretch of time I’d gone without shaving since high school. (This would be the equivalent of a white person not shaving for a single day, or an Indian person not shaving for like…six hours.) Wildly euphoric and delirious from my beard high, I even recklessly accepted a dare from Jess that I couldn’t go two weeks straight without shaving.

I did not make the two weeks. I shaved last Tuesday.

It got to be too much for me, sitting in meetings, jealously looking at all the glorious beards of all the brown guys and Polish guys around me, taunting my crude approximation of a beard. Plus, my parents endlessly gave me shit for it, subtlety destroying my self esteem in the deprecating yet loving way that only parents can.

But I’ve caught a glimpse of its true power now…and I’ve opened a door that cannot ever be closed again.

– Check out this Kevin Martin dunk against the Blazers in preseason, which – while impressive – is really only enjoyable because it came from a bet he made with Mikki Moore as to who could dunk on Greg Oden first.

– Dan’s comment has prompted me to think…as a socio-politically disadvantaged group, there should be more affirmative action policies in place to abate the rampant discrimination against the Asian male. Perhaps policies should be put in place where certain recruitment quotas are established, like how companies are legally obligated to hire a certain number of the disabled into their workforce, or how Canadian radio stations are required to fill like 40% or whatever of their airtime with crappy Canadian music. Every year, the population of Asian women need to meet a certain quota of Asian guys dated, which will in turn be closely scrutinized and compared against the percentage of white guys dated, and so forth. I’d consider it a great success if we could get the ratio back to 1:1. We’d also push to get a similar percentage established with white women as well, but honestly…even establishing a quota in the first place would have to be considered a huge victory, worthy of its own national holiday. But no fat, anime loving otaku hood rats! That doesn’t count.

This will be my election campaign for when the factions divide and the inevitable Race Wars start. I will broker these deals, and the years of social and emotional abuse of my brothers at the hands of evil, whorish Asian women and the white guys that date them will finally begin to be compensated for. We will hold software development and superstar comic book artists as bargaining chips. See how long your way of life will last after we take those off the table!

– Hollywood Director Attack Ads asks the question “What if famous directors were commissioned to helm campaign ads for John McCain?” And then it answers them. With a vengeance.

– And finally, a quality version of the alleged teaser trailer for Dragonball. It looks…glorious.

I’ve had Crowed House randomly stuck in my head the whole day, but I don’t remember the words at all, so I’ve had these two lines just endlessly loop over and over again in my brain, driving me insane. Don’t try and look for deeper meaning in today’s (or any day’s) quotable post send-off.

Hey now, hey now
Don’t dream it’s over
Hey now, hey now
Don’t dream it’s over
Hey now, hey now
Don’t dream it’s over