Don’t leave early for this one – I promise the best link’s at the bottom.

– Let’s just quickly get the rest of this Happy Gilmore stuff off of my plate…this is a rather amusing 2006 order by a bankruptcy judge dismissing some motion on the grounds of it being too incomprehensible to decipher, leading to an interesting footnote at the end of the document. Also, please check out this weird two part featurette bit for Funny People showcasing Aziz Ansari as the fictional comic Raaaaaaaandy, who probably appears in the movie for like five total minutes. I don’t know what I find so particularly good about this…maybe something about how it just perfectly straddles the line between being legitimately funny and satirically funny…and if DJ Ol’ Youngin doesn’t kill you with the “WORKIN ON DEM TEEF” part, then you’re a much better man than I. Actually, that whole bit is murder…even just the fact that he’s working off of a Macbook…it’s all so ridiculous. Judd Apatow and his crew have gone insane, they filmed so much extra crap for this movie I don’t even want to post it all – just check the Wikipedia article for the movie and all the fictional websites created for the film which feature all these clips of movies and shows that are supposed to be within the actual movie they’re marketing, the only actual real movie…I don’t know, the whole thing’s like this weird metaphysical marketing thing that’s got me buggin’ out. To start, there’s a whole series of weird Yo Teach! bits in the related video sections of the Raaaaaaaandy bits that Jason Schwartzman’s character in the movie presumably stars in…those are really strange and deadpan, easily the stupidest, but arguably the funniest ones.

The more I hear about this movie, the more I want to watch it. And this is also probably the first time I’ve been looking forward to the eventual DVD/Blu-ray more than the actual movie itself, just because I’m curious to see exactly what the scope of all the extra stuff they filmed includes. Reminds me of Wake Up, Ron Burgundy, but less insane and with like ten times more content.

– Aside from those, Drunk Letter Writing is my new favourite video of the week – great idea, great acting, great execution, great all around! Posting is so easy when you go the main page of Funny Or Die and then just copy half the links onto here.

– Here’s the trailer for Mystery Team, set to debut at the Sundance Film Festival and currently still looking for a studio to distribute it. I hope they find one soon. Otherwise I hope they don’t and just quickly get back to making stupid internet videos instead.

– In other movie news…Sam Raimi has been hired to direct a WarCraft movie. By Blizzard themselves (press release here) along with the studio and the producer behind The Dark Knight. I essentially just consider this another iteration of a Lord of the Rings movie, except hopefully shorter, and therefore, better. Pretty cool stuff…although I think it’s hilarious how Blizzard includes a four hundred word long disclaimer at the end of their press releases now cautioning the verbiage used in regards to “forward-looking statements” – so as cool as this news is to me right now, I can only wonder how cool this will be to me when the movie finally comes out in the year 2056, while we’re all in the middle of the Cyber Zombie Space Wars and movies are no longer a viable source for entertainment. Probably not that cool.

– If you’re interested in how the Cyber Zombie Space Wars will start, then I refer you this interesting article on optogenetics. The basic idea is that scientists have now figured out a way to treat psychological disorders by genetically altering your neurons so that parts of your brain can be turned on and off by shining blue or yellow light on them. Scientists will do this by injecting a virus into your brain to attach this new gene, found in algae, to your brain cells. When it is eventually discovered that the portion of the brain that controls depression is right next to the portion of your brain that tells you not to turn into a zombie and devour the flesh of the living…I will be the first to say “I told you so.”

– Finally, if your name is Jessica Pang, this is the end of my post. For the rest of you, I’m just going to post this random link to the second page of the photo gallery on Rockwood’s website for July 4th, 2009. What you choose to do with this link is entirely up to you, and what you will find on the other side, if there is anything to find at all, is something that is not known to me.

God, just look at him. What a huge douche.

Man is but a slave to his past…