Epic Steel Time

Let’s get to the baseball related stuff over with first so that we can better enjoy the non-baseball portion of this post.

Last night was generally considered to be the single greatest regular season night in the entire history of baseball. It involved historically bad collapses by both the Braves and the Red Sox, who became the first two teams in major league history to blow eight game divisional leads in September.

Personally, I relished Boston’s collapse the most because there is no team in the world that you’d like to hate more. I delight in the Sox’s failure more than I delight in the Jays’ success, that is how hateful baseball has made me. The fact that it was Jonathan Papelbon’s blown save that did them in is the sweetest aspect, because that guy is the douchey face of the douchiest team in the world, and I cannot imagine a more fitting man for all that horrible failure to heap on top of.

Baseball has a funny way of turning logical, rational people into superstitious wrecks…twisting the beliefs of the most hardened sabermetric nerds such that even they start talking in terms of karma and destiny. Case in point…look at the walk-off home run that Evan Longoria (who is more popular than Eva now, that is how crazy the world has become) hits…it just clears that little depressed notch next to the left field foul pole. In any other park in the league, it hits the wall, and the game keeps going.

Now check out the walk-off single that freshly born Red Sox killer Robert Andino hits…and note the Boston left fielder that fails to come up with what looks like a pretty catchable ball. Carl Crawford, the $142 million dollar man they signed away from Tampa Bay Moneyball style, whose shitty play has been killing Boston (and my fantasy team) all year.

And the reason they lowered that section of the left field wall in Tampa to start with.

I don’t know if that is karma or just fitting coincidence…but I love it, and it delights me to no end. Gotta love this game.

– One more quick bit…new(ish) leak of the new(ish) Blue Jays logo next year. Looks pretty neat, it’s obviously a throwback to the first logo, but there are some differences. I’m a fan of the slightly sleeker, more angular look…but the red maple leaf just looks a little out of place now that it isn’t really integrated into the rest of the logo like before. It’s just sitting there by itself, like it was an earring on the bird’s non-existent ears. Anyway, I need to see how the full uniforms are going to look before full judgement can be passed, but it’s looking like the future for the Blue Jays is getting more and more interesting. Especially if they end up adding another playoff spot as rumoured, and considering that (thanks to Boston’s amazing choke job) this year’s AL Wild Card winner had the worst record in ten years.

– Music video for The Stampede by Biting Elbows…? Sure. Pretty accurate take on the tedium of interoffice politics.

– Bridesmaids just came out on Blu-Ray, and one of the extra bits on it includes this…incredibly insane extended argument scene between Kristen Wiig and the teenage girl in the jewelry store. And when I say extended…I mean like…fucking extended, like they go back and forth in character for…holy shit, fucking ten minutes. I don’t know if this is one single continuous take or not…and honestly, I’m not sure whether that would be more or less insane than if this was multiple takes cut and edited together. Is this a ridiculous improv tour de force or a blatant example of rampant, unbridled film making gone wrong? Did someone purposely form this or was it a crazy random occurrence of chance? Like…why does this exist!?! Weird bit of trivia, the girl is Mia Frampton, daughter of Peter. Like as in…”legendary rock legend Peter Frampton” Peter Frampton. Crazy.

– Fun fact…up until today, I didn’t know the line from Bruno Mars’ Marry You was actually “Is it the look in your eyes / Or is it this dancing juice?” I thought it was “Or is these dancing Jews?” because…I don’t know, I thought the setting of the song was at a Bar Mitzvah or something. Wouldn’t be the first time that romance has been stirred up by the allure of Semitic rhythmic stylings.

I woke up today with the line stuck in my head for some reason, and it’s honestly been the first time I’ve really paid attention to the lyrics. Still, this realization has completely changed the meaning of this song for me. It went from “man, this Bar Mitzvah has really opened my eyes to you” to “fuuuuuuck…I’m drunk as shit, let’s get hitched.” The real lyrics really kind of takes away from the song, I think.

– Did you know that Real Steel is coming out October 7th, and that it is in IMAX!?! I am certain now that there is no chance I will not be watching this movie. There’s really only two types of people in this world – those that think this movie will be the greatest ever, or those that are wrong.

G’day IMAX fans. My new movie Real Steel hits…theatres October 7th. Seein’ it in IMAX is the only way to get a knock-you-out-of-your-seat experience. Enjoy.